Are you thinking of getting married? It might seem the easiest thing to do by signing a piece of paper and saying few words but when it comes to handling your married life, it can be sometimes tricky. A recent survey says that almost 50% of people get divorced and the most common reason is a misunderstanding due to different money mindsets. Marriage is not just between two people it’s between two different families- different in mindsets, lifestyle etc. Before you finally decide on marriage, it’s essential to ask each other few questions during the courtship phase so that you can know how this relationship would work in future. The questions you ask before marriage can be the foundation of a workable relationship and help you in understanding each other’s perspective on various aspects such as finance, future plans, commitments etc.
Money Vs marriage:
Money is an essential part of our life and equally important part of a successful marriage as well. Most of the clashes in a marital relationship happen because of financial misunderstandings.
[highlight]“Money is the biggest cause of friction in a Marriage.”[/highlight]
As money issues are one of the key aspects of a broken marriage, it becomes necessary to know and clear views as early as possible. We all are well aware of the fact that successful marriage comes with compromise and the willingness to adapt each other as they are. The courtship period is the most interesting phase of our lives, it is the time when the heart starts pounding and the brain goes into hibernation. We all flow with the river of emotions and sometimes forget to do what is more essential- check your compatibility.
Money is the strength, for some, it is their weakness. Different people have the different perspective about money. So, it’s important to know if you’re money mindset compatible with your would-be. Hence, before you make finalize on making the partnership legal and tie the wedding knot, it makes sense to know his/her financial view and see how it matches with yours. In the initial phase of a relationship, few couples find it difficult to combine assets. As they wouldn’t like to be accountable or neither would like the idea of someone scrutinizing their spending decisions. Watch out for such behavior, it can be warned for a clash in the relationship in future.
So, wear your thinking caps ask thoughtful questions to your partner, and carefully observe the answers to know their views. There is rarely any chance that their perspective might change after marriage.
We share with you 10 important things to look for in your future spouse to figure out his/her financial intentions and money habits.
10 Important aspects to consider:
- Does your future spouse find it difficult to talk about money?
- Was there an open conversation about money matters in their family?
- Are your future in-laws financially stable? No, that doesn’t mean you’re checking their bank balance. But you need to know if they’re financially unstable, to be prepared for the future to take care of their financial needs as well.
- Take a note on the spending habits, is it thoughtful or careless? This can give you a clear insight into how they manage their money.
- Ask about a goal they achieved- know the details of how it was like, how did they achieve it?
- Any allowance ever received and the way it was spent or saved.
- Ask if they ever faced a failure and how they dealt with it. (As it is an important aspect: “Resilience is an essential part of a successful future.”)
- Share real-life instances (good or bad times) and the role of money in it. Know their plot as well and understand the views.
- Listen for comments about the bills in collection, any late payments or any debts.
- Listen to the views about work, future plans etc.
Marriage is a beautiful commitment. By knowing each other’s view on important aspects of life can make your relationship healthier and long-lasting. So, before you take your wedding vows, know your partner and his/her views well. Hope the above-mentioned questions would help you to get started with what to ask your partner before marriage.
[highlight]“Communication in a relationship is like oxygen to life; without it… it dies.”[/highlight]
~ Tony Gaskins
In this modern era, where everything is materialistic, you would be the last one to have a materialistic relationship as well. Today, so many marriages end in failure due to varied reasons and money doesn’t have to be one in that list. You can talk your heart out and have a healthy conversation to understand your partner’s financial history and mindset, this way you make your way into a long-term relationship.]]>